Lessons from Egypt

I've taken a challenge to read through the Bible in 90 days. Wow, that was quite a commitment too! I'm glad I made the choice to do it though. I have been learning a lot and God has been speaking to my heart through it. I will finish up Deuteronomy today. Last night I was really thinking about how Israel traveled through the desert and time after time they grumbled and complained and time and again God provided and took care of them. I wondered what it would be like to have God descend as a cloud over the Tent of Meeting and to be fire at other times. What would it be like and how could you doubt God was with you? Then God sent a dream to me last night. I got up feeling a little blue after the dream. The dream was that circumstances the lack of good paying jobs made us move to a new area. Bri, who has been home schooled her entire life had to return to school in 6th grade. Our entire family was struggling in this strange land full of strangers. We were miserable, yes we were making more, but Alex had not followed us to this strange land, Bri was lost in the school system, and Eddie and I were just floating through it best we could. My heart was so heavy and I wanted to go home so bad, even if things were worse at home. God told me that is how the Israelites felt, they wanted to be free, not slaves, the land they had to travel through was hard and not at all the life they had known. Yes, they knew He was ever present and would take care of their needs, but am I really any different. After all the last two years I myself have been in a wilderness too. Have I always trusted God to provide for me or have I doubted? I wish I could say that in the wilderness of our lives over the past two years I always trusted never doubted that everything would work out. Honestly, I doubted, I cried out to God, pleaded, I bargained, and sometimes I was just angry. It has not been pretty at all sometimes. Three years ago, everything was going really well for us. We were on the best financial footing we had ever been on as a married couple and let me tell that was a great feeling! We were paying bills off, paying cash for trips, saving, paying down our debt. Then the bottom fell out. It all seemed to start sliding when Dad died. Five months later Eddie had a heart attack followed by open heart surgery to unclog 5 blocked arteries. Two months off work, no pay, medical bills, an air conditioner that went out the day Eddie came home from the hospital, the dryer broke and the microwave died and did I mention our new pharmacy bill. Just a few months before this we had bought a stove to replace our dying stove. We did it on a no interest one year loan just knowing I could pay it in 6 months, but the still small voice said don't. We did, now I'm paying for that too. Yes, we had an emergency fund but it was drained pretty quickly. I will tell you looking back, God provided for the two months without pay, we never went hungry, we never even missed a bill payment. Of course, some of the debt we took on we are still dealing with, more ugly cries to God came. Eddie made it back to work, but his office closed within 2 months. New job, completely different field for Eddie, less pay, but better benefits. Yes, I was thankful, but God how can I pay our house note on this and still feed my family? Why is God that some people never struggle, they have nice clothes, nice house, nice cars, nice trips. God let me know I to have those things in the eyes of others less fortunate than me. Even the people who seem to have no worries or struggles do, God gave a glimpse into the lives of some of the people I was pointing too. They have problems I would not want, I'll take my house, my paid for car, my thrift store find clothes, and the trips we are blessed to take. No, I'm not much different from the Israelites at all. Are you? I challenge you to give it some thought today. Pick up your Bible and read it for yourselves.